HOW TO WRITE A LOVE LETTER

EVEN IN A HEALTHY, LOVING RELATIONSHIP, WE NEED TO BE TOLD AND SHOWN THAT WE ARE LOVED.

It is dangerous to assume that our spouses “just know” that we love them…either because we’ve been married for so long or because everything is running smoothly. No matter how long a relationship has lasted, intimacy continues to require three things…intention, attention and action.

That’s why a love letter, written in your own hand, can be more powerful than any confection stirred up by Godiva®. It demonstrates your intention to tell your spouse how you feel about him or her. It requires attention…something not lost on the person to whom you are writing. Finally, the action of writing and giving your spouse the letter is concrete evidence of your love.

Even if you’re uncomfortable trying to put your thoughts into words, you can do it if you follow a few simple steps.

Start by setting aside at least 30 minutes to put down your thoughts. If possible, write the letter on some pretty stationery.

Begin the letter by focusing on what you love about your spouse. Talk about what it is about him or her which attracted you in the first place. Be very personal by mentioning what you consider to be his or her most alluring physical attributes…her eyes, his strong shoulders, the special smile she saves just for you, the sound of his voice, the curve of her hips. The important thing is to be very very detailed.

In the second paragraph, mention the character traits you most appreciate about your spouse...his or her kindness, patience, intelligence, sense of humor or whatever else you find attractive.

In the third paragraph, talk about how your spouse makes you feel…the thrill you still feel when you know you’re going to make love, the comfort you derive knowing he’s there for you when times are tough or perhaps the companionship you feel when you travel together…again, be detailed and give examples.

Close the letter by using the phrase, “I love you.” These are the most powerful three words you can ever use with your spouse, especially when followed closely by "I want you."

Sign the letter, then put it where your spouse will find it when you’re not together. Make it a sweet surprise.

That’s all there is to it.

Now here’s the frosting on the cake. Writing the love letter will not only thrill your spouse, it will serve to remind you of what attracted you to him or her in the first place. It will bring back the excitement of new love and the strong feelings of sexual attraction you felt when you were first discovering each other. By reaching back into your memory and dwelling on the physical and emotional attraction you first felt for each other, you will find yourself experiencing those feelings again. You may even find yourself falling in love all over again!

And isn’t it exciting to know that you can recapture those feelings over and over again….just by writing a love letter?

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